Am still rather awed by the indisputable fact that our cats, who are always quite raucous & downright pushy in letting me know it is time for their breakfast, completely held back any clamor for me to get up & get feeding them. They were there, with me, but to a cat they were silent. As if they understood that what I was processing was important, worthy of their wait. It might sound silly, even absurd, but that was what happened & it has no other explanation.
Many an older friend came to my mind's eye, each a shining example of someone who continued to be connected to their family, friends & communities throughout their lives, who might have ultimately experienced limited abilities but who always seemed to make the most of what they could manage.
Strangely enough, the people I thought most about were not Cornelia Stroh or Sylvia Cooper or Dave Z's parents - the people I would have expected to be uppermost in my mind. Instead, it was a local family & their mother, people I barely know.
The unusual quality of their parents' - indeed, the family's collective - saging came into my awareness when their universally beloved father died. As the family gathered at their parents' home, a caterer was hired to provide all their meals AND keep the fridge filled with sips & nibbles, freeing the kids & their mom to fully enjoy the time together, to make it a celebration of a dad & husband, to always be ready to roll out the welcome mat to friends & even more family stopping by.
When I heard that story, many years back, it made me pause & think, "Now, that's a family that understands what life is all about!" While it's true they had the financial wherewithal to make it happen, my guess is they would have figured out something similar even if they had been just scrapping by.
The more recent story I heard told about the same family involved their long-standing family tradition of gathering at their mother's for supper & game night, a tradition they are reported to still continue, even though their mom has been unaware for some time of their presence. She might not be able to acknowledge, maybe not even fully sense, that her loved ones are around her, yet there they be, still having fun as a family, week after precious week.
THOSE are oh-so-special best practices!
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