MAKING A DIFFERENCE TO THAT ONE

Yesterday was a beaut! The weather was pleasantly warm, the sky was filled with dramatic clouds, but there wasn't any sense of humidity. In a summer over-burdened with either HOT weather or rain, it was the first day I could take a sky-loving grannie client to the Chestnut Hill Grill for a mid-afternoon nip & nibble.

What fun we had, sitting on the porch, watching the clouds & the crowds roll by.

Chestnut Hill Grill is smack dab on Germantown Avenue, so we had a great view of passersby. What fun seeing my grannie client's eyes LIGHT UP each time she spotted a mother pushing a carriage, an older sister out with younger siblings, a father toting packages for the nearby post office, two boys close by his side. We must have watched at least thirty children pass by, either directly in front of us or on the other side of the busy street. And every time a parent-child(ren) pairing or a group of tweens strolled past us, I could feel the incredible lightness of being radiating from my dear friend.

We'd gone to the Chestnut Hill Grill because it is such a wonderful spot to cloud watch. The clouds were a distant second to the people watching. I hope to get back there at least twice before autumn's chill sets in.

It never occurred to me to think about how many younger people, how many children, folks living in a "senior lifecare" residence see from day to day.

I never thought to fully notice how many younger people I see on any given day. Just from my front window, I spot kids walking to the bus stop or - steps lighter, brisker - returning in the late afternoon. Walking out to pick up the mail, I catch a glimpse of my 20-something next door neighbor working on his car or a 50ish friend across the street mowing his lawn, or friends two doors up welcoming a visit from their grandkids. It never registered that I've known the young man since he was five, the 50ish fellow since he was in his 20s, had grandma & grandpa's daughters to my house for crafting back when they were six and nine. Seeing not just other people, but people with whom I have a continuity of friendship, is an everyday blessing that deserves celebration & recognition.

If it wasn't for going out yesterday, enjoying an elegant dish of chocolate mousse as the world rolled by, when would my grannie client have soaked it all in? In those relatively short minutes that we were there, indulging in an elegant dish of chocolate mousse & delighting in joy of life unfolding around us, the importance, the immediate impact of what I do hit home all over again. What I do isn't going to make her any less lonely when she wakes up in the middle of the night, in her small bed, in her small bedroom, in her small apartment. It's not going to fill the rest of her day or evening with activities. But for those moments, she seemed whole & happy & connected, and that - to me - is everything.

Life went past us, as we sat on that porch. A trio of older people - they looked to be in their early 70s - arrived with luggage, reminding us that the building is also the veddy nice, veddy discreet Chestnut Hill Hotel. We went off on a fantasy, wondering the reason for their visit -

a wedding? A class reunion? A friend's special birthday?  More smiles.

On the way back to the car, we strolled past four young mothers with wee small babies; two were less than six weeks, one was about two months & the oldest was six months. How my friend reveled in oohing & ahhing over the sweet things, at the opportunity to talk MOM with the young women.

On the drive back, I didn't hear a single caustic peep about "Well, time to return to prison." Dropping her off, I felt infused with smiles as my dear older friend, filled with the sense of the day, flung her door open & stepped sprightly out of the car. As she moved toward the automatically opening door, she sure seemed to me to be walking on air.

There's an oft-told story by Loren Eisley about a young girl & starfish:

A young girl was walking along a beach upon which thousands of starfish had been washed up during a terrible storm. When she came to each starfish, she would pick it up, and throw it back into the ocean. People watched her with amusement.

She had been doing this for some time when a man approached her and said, “Little girl, why are you doing this? Look at this beach! You can’t save all these starfish. You can’t begin to make a difference!”
 

The girl seemed crushed, suddenly deflated. But after a few moments, she bent down, picked up another starfish, and hurled it as far as she could into the ocean. Then she looked up at the man and replied,

“Well, I made a difference to that one!”

The old man looked at the girl inquisitively and thought about what she had done and said. Inspired, he joined the little girl in throwing starfish back into the sea. Soon others joined, and all the starfish were saved.

 

I might not be able to change life for all the stranded older people who live in places with filtered air & artificial light, where the only young people they generally see are staff or caregivers. I can't possibly save them all.

But, yesterday, I made a difference to that  one.